Thursday, May 14, 2009

Pouring out my heart...

As you can tell by that last post, I was not in the most jolly of moods yesterday.

I cried a lot last night. It's amazing how just one thing can start the tears when you're in that kind of a melancholy. I talked to the Professor who was stuck at the airport in Chicago. He was encouraging and patient. He loves me and I'm glad.

The kids wanted to go to church. I would rather have stayed home.
But we went anyway. I sang the first song during the worship set. Then I just talked to God for the next two.

Then this song came up in the set. The first words had me in tears.
Here I am
Once again
I pour out my heart
For I know that you hear
Every cry
You are listening
No matter what state
My heart is in

You are faithful to answer

I think I made the lady next to me nervous because I just cried.
I was just so grateful to a God that will listen -- no matter what state my heart is in.

God wasn't done.
This morning, I logged on to Facebook and read the following from the JesusFreaks group...

RELATIONSHIPS(sovereign, promise-land and provisional)

I feel the body of Christ is groaning and mourning the loss of certain relationships. I keep running into people with stories of losing long time friendships and relationships, some are very obvious that God is removing some of these folks out of there lives and others not so obvious. The old relationships most of the time don’t produce much fruit but are comfortable. The new ones are uncomfortable but produce fruit.

Have we ever stopped to think about God’s perfect will for us, really? He has all the right people lined up to walk with us and in the right timing. Sometimes him removing us from relationships is him bringing us closer to himslef and further away from the world.

If you were to ask yourself about the relationships in your life right now, are they bringing you closer or further from or to the lord. I believe the lord is sifting our relationships to align us to those who will draw out the treasures within us.

• example- taking us further into sin. Speaking negatively about us. Someone in your life that has nothing good ever to say about you no fruit comes from that the lord is probably going to remove them from your life. This does not mean you wont run into them or even talk every now and again but the relationship will probably not be as it was.

I stopped reading right here.
Because this was exactly what was said in church on Sunday. Are those you are aligned with bringing you down ?? Or taking you higher?

Okay - you can continue reading if you want. or just skip to the end....

1: the state of being related or interrelated 2: the relation connecting or binding participants in a relationship: as a: KINSHIP b: a specific instance or type of kinship 3 a: a state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings b: a romantic or passionate attachment
1 a: the act or process of providing b: the fact or state of being prepared beforehand c: a measure taken beforehand to deal with a need or contingency : PREPARATION 2: a stock of needed materials or supplies ; especially : a stock of food —usually used in plural
1 a: one possessing or held to possess sovereignty b: one that exercises supreme authority within a limited sphere c: an acknowledged leader : ARBITER2: any of various gold coins of the United Kingdom

Promise Land- the inheritance to the Israelites and God’s people.
Numbers 10:29-34
29 Now Moses said to Hobab son of Reuel the Midianite, Moses' father-in-law, "We are setting out for the place about which the LORD said, 'I will give it to you.' Come with us and we will treat you well, for the LORD has promised good things to Israel."
30 He answered, "No, I will not go; I am going back to my own land and my own people."
31 But Moses said, "Please do not leave us. You know where we should camp in the desert, and you can be our eyes. 32 If you come with us, we will share with you whatever good things the LORD gives us." (he was befriending him with compliments)
33 So they set out from the mountain of the LORD and traveled for three days. The ark of the covenant of the LORD went before them during those three days to find them a place to rest. 34 The cloud of the LORD was over them by day when they set out from the camp.
Moses needed Hobabs skills in the desert so he befriended him. This was a sovereign relationship,promiseland and provisional.
Judges 3:5-7
5 The Israelites lived among the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. 6 They took their daughters in marriage and gave their own daughters to their sons, and served their gods.
7 The Israelites did evil in the eyes of the LORD; they forgot the LORD their God and served the Baals and the Asherahs.
Relationships affect our faith. When we befriend those that do not know God it might lead us into literally becoming idolaters as in the above Scripture.

Moses lead the Isrealites into the desert but Joshua lead them into the Promiseland.

Moses- provisional relationship
Joshua- promiseland relationship
Jesus- ultimately the real promiseland relationship

So I have to pause (pun intended) in marking the passing of time and relationships - simply because they might not be the best for ME and my family. Those, that are good will prevail - or return if they have gone away.

That's just the way it has to be.

In the meantime, Shaggy wears a cone.
I'll love on my Nina extra.
And continue on the course God has for our family...desiring God's best.

You're the best!
Thanks for listening!!!


Growin' With It said...

why is it that God uses you to speak to my heart at just the right time?

i love that about you!

The Gang's Momma! said...

Ahhhhh. Lovely. What perfect timing the Lord has, to speak to us when we need to hear it. When we are ready to hear it. Thank you again for sharing what He's doing in you, through you, and for you. So refreshing to read your words here. Like water on a dry land!

TobyBo said...

I am feeling thick here and not quite following what is going on for you but that's OK. I seem to get the drift that you are sad and unhappy about changing relationships and so I am praying for you. And wearing yellow, actually.

Mother Mayhem said...